Ex Nihilo

I was certain it was all or nothing.
Could ignorance gamble a different solution?
But in the end, it was all for nothing.

Desperately through ashes I was sifting.
Had I recourse but to hold fast the illusion
of one solution – of all or nothing?

Beneath the foundation I was digging.
Perhaps not all was lost and the real delusion
was scribed on the wall as: all for nothing.

Only ashes and dust am I reaping
– gripping, ripping from the earth in my vexation
as each angel that swore “All or nothing.”

Now not even remorse counts for something
– yes, it might outweigh every other emotion,
but it can’t pay this debt of all for nothing.

What is left but hope- oh that cruelest thing,
for “ex nihilo” is ever the conclusion.
Are you certain it is all or nothing?
Can you pay the price of all for nothing?