Leaning up against the door frame,
I watched you finish your makeup.
Pausing for a moment with your mascara,
you caught my eye in the mirror…
and smiled.
How domestic, how nostalgic
this moment was.
Yes, that smile was so familiar
but it was only the specter
of one I held so much dearer,
and left, many years ago.
Pareidolia? Perhaps.
And I suspect you would laugh
at this pathetic confession
from a sentimental man
that just left you breathless and satisfied.
For what was sentimentality
to an emotional artist?
An artist so disconnected from her creations:
dissonant machinations
of commodified emotions.
You could paint a smile for any occasion.
You would be nostalgic for each lover.
Ah! And you never missed a chance to check your reflection.
– how I watched you practice in the glass.
So mesmerizing, so detached.
God, now I wonder,
for a girl that spent so much time
in front of the mirror,
did you find yourself so familiar?
Tag: sex
Chasm
Will you fill the void?
Will you bridge this divide?
Or will you watch me slip
into the space between
and tell me
“I don’t owe you anything.”
I let her fall
into the chasm of my indifference,
only to turn and find myself
still on the other side of yours.
Yet how can I cross that
which you insist does not even exist?
Oh but it does and I persist,
and with unfailingly devotion,
carry out your every request.
For you say that you do love me,
that you do want me.
So I believe
that if I fulfill your every need,
you will want
to satisfy just this one of mine.
But I am exhausted
by this process of elimination.
Time, money and emotion
all fall short,
and I scramble back
to the martyr’s edge,
– hear the jaws snap
as resentment lowers
its haggard head.
